Chapter 17: My Subordinates Are So Competent, It’s Driving Me Insane
by xennovelWhat I thought was the crisis of a lifetime—the issue with the horse—resolved itself unexpectedly easily.
After exchanging a few messages, Ed had the horse taken away and a carriage prepared.
Then, approaching me, he meticulously sought my understanding with extreme politeness… Honestly, I wondered why he was being so deferential.
Not that I minded.
Anyway, after receiving Ed’s repeated apologies, I boarded the carriage and was now leaving the castle, heading towards the city.
Naturally, the road was far from paved, so my backside ached with every jolt of the carriage… but well, I had to endure it. It was still much better than riding that horse.
And even if I didn’t want to endure it, I had no choice. Ed was right in front of me, after all.
Claiming he had something to explain, he sat opposite me, calmly flipping through documents in the violently shaking carriage, reading the tiny print.
Truly remarkable ability.
“The reason monsters target the city is simple: abundant food. Originally, they preyed on small, defenseless villages, but now that only cities remain, it’s natural they’d flock there.”
“But wouldn’t you say the Demon King’s castle is also the size of a small city…?”
“But Demon King-nim is present in the Demon King’s castle. And the legion commanders as well.”
“Ah.”
“On the other hand, the city is filled with relatively weaker beings. The Demon King’s castle, teeming with unfathomable power, versus a city that might be overcome with sheer numbers. If you had to choose between the two, wouldn’t you naturally choose the city?”
Monsters lack reason. They are driven purely by instinct.
Since they lack reason, their instincts must be highly developed; they couldn’t possibly fail to sense the aura emanating from the Demon King’s castle. Even if they didn’t sense it, they could at least perceive the danger.
They may lack reason, but they aren’t without emotion.
As long as their sense of fear remains intact, it’s only natural they would avoid the Demon King’s castle.
“And cities are frequently visited by people from other regions for trade. So, by guarding the roads, they could easily secure a meal.”
“Since that’s no longer the case, they’re targeting the castle itself.”
“Yes, that’s cor…”
Wham!
Graaaaargh!
The carriage shook violently. My paper-thin body shook too.
Ed naturally caught me as I lurched forward, likely about to headbutt something. He checked to see if I was alright before settling me back in my seat and continuing as if nothing had happened.
“…Therefore, we will…”
-Kill them!!
…establish defenses…”
-Don’t let them anywhere near the carriage!
“…soon.”
-You damn monsters!! Die! Just die already!!
…Truly remarkable, in many ways.
There had been several monster attacks on the way here. So many that even I, who was initially terrified, could now sit here calmly.
But Ed’s composure was beyond anything normal.
Unable to bear it any longer, I cautiously opened the window and peered outside, casually asking,
The outside was a scene of chaos.
“Ed, aren’t you going to help?”
“The legionnaires will handle it. Rest assured, the 0th Legion is not just any legion.”
“Oh… well…”
They certainly seemed to be handling it. The legionnaires were steadily cutting down the monsters.
None of them seemed to be seriously injured, and they all seemed capable of taking on at least one monster on their own…
But… why is Ben out there?
“Die! Just die already!!”
Squish!
Blood splattered. I quickly recoiled, slamming the window shut.
I thought I’d moved quickly, but it seemed I was too late. A warm liquid smeared my cheek.
Well, one thing’s for sure. Ben is definitely not in his right mind right now.
As I roughly wiped it away with the back of my hand, Ed, looking horrified, his face pale, frantically pulled out a handkerchief and dabbed at my cheek, saying with an air of finality,
“It would be best to open the window after the battle is over.”
“Ah, yes. Understood. But Ben…”
I recalled the scene of Ben from just a moment ago.
Swinging his medical bag, smashing a monster’s head while screaming even louder than it was.
It was enough to make me question his profession.
Wasn’t he a doctor? Where did the doctor go, and who was this berserker?
“Ah, once Ben gets a taste for it, he has trouble holding back. He is a demon, after all.”
Right, a demon. I’d momentarily forgotten.
He’s a doctor and good at fighting too. Wouldn’t just having him around be enough?
But he can’t control himself once he starts rampaging, so I definitely don’t want to be alone with him.
Recalling the times we’d been alone for treatment and other purposes, a delayed wave of dread washed over me, and I subtly clutched my stomach.
‘Ugh, my stomach hurts.’
It feels like my lifespan is shortening the more capable people I have around me.
-Hahahaha! Die, you bastards!!
“Haa….”
Listening to Ben’s crazed voice from outside, I leaned my head weakly against the carriage wall.
Ah, I hope this monster business ends soon.
“Brief break!”
“Break!”
Ed’s booming voice squeezed through the gaps in the door and into the carriage. Followed by the echoing voices of the legionnaires.
Stretching out my stiff body after sitting for so long, I thought to myself,
‘Judging by that, he really is the adjutant.’
He’s been attending to my every need and running errands so much, I was starting to confuse him with a servant.
From the Empire’s perspective, that’s what a vice-commander should be doing, but in the Demon King’s castle, the commanders’ adjutants also serve as vice-commanders, so Ed is performing his role perfectly.
Being cooped up in the carriage all day was stifling, and wanting to give my aching backside a rest and get some fresh air, I got out of the carriage.
The first thing I saw as I opened the door and stepped out was a group of black horses emitting a dark aura. Each one exuded an overwhelming presence, and they were gathered together, tearing at something.
The scene almost looked peaceful for a moment, and I was slightly relieved.
‘Well, they are still horses, I guess. Seeing them grazing peacefully despite their appearance… huh?’
…Something’s a bit off.
Isn’t that… a monster corpse?
It is. It really is a monster corpse. So, these guys are currently gathered peacefully, tearing apart a monster corpse…
The realization hit me, and I instinctively recoiled.
I only snapped back to my senses when I felt the hard, cold carriage door against my back.
“Demon-nim.”
……
“Demon-nim?”
……
Damn it, they’re terrifying! And there are so many of them.
There are as many as there are legionnaires, so it’s only natural there would be many… but they’re still scary. They wouldn’t suddenly go crazy, would they?
Perhaps it’s their fearsome appearance, unseen in the Human Realm, but my gaze keeps drifting towards them against my will.
It’s definitely not because I’m interested in them. Well, maybe I am interested. Keeping them in my sight for vigilance is a kind of interest, after all.
As I blankly stared at the herd of horses, a water bottle suddenly appeared right in front of my face.
“Demon-nim, would you like some water?”
A rather polite demeanor for such a sudden offering.
The one holding it out – or rather, presenting it – was none other than my loyal adjutant, Ed.
I had actually expected it.
‘How many people would be this devoted to me?’
Even though I’m just a human, he diligently fulfills his duties.
“Thank you.”
Gratitude for the water, and gratitude for fulfilling his duties towards a human like me without any outward aversion.
Ed, oblivious to the double meaning, simply smiled in response, as if it were the most natural thing in the world.
Then, glancing at the herd of horses I had been staring at a moment ago, then back at me, he cautiously began to speak, as if bracing himself.
“Just now, I noticed… you seemed to be looking at the horses…”
“Ah, yes.”
Damn it, I’d managed to forget about them.
Yes, I was looking at them. In case they went berserk.
The sturdy demons might be fine, but if someone as frail as me were to be trampled by those things, my body and soul would be instantly separated. So, I have no choice but to be cautious.
But to notice that, he must be watching me very closely. Did the Demon King give him orders?
‘Or maybe it’s because of the resignation letter?’
Does he think I might run away?
It’s a somewhat plausible guess.
As I internally scoffed at the Demon King’s obsessive behavior, Ed, after a moment of hesitation, slowly began to speak. The words that came from his slightly parted lips were completely unexpected.
“Perhaps… you wish to ride a horse?”
“Excuse me?”
“So, you still have lingering desires…”
We were having such a nice conversation, and now he’s suddenly saying this. Does he think I want to ride those gruesome things?
Dumbfounded, I could only gape before belatedly waving my hands in denial.
But it seemed he interpreted that differently.
“No, that’s not it at all. It’s just…”
“I apologize. While it may be frustrating, wouldn’t you agree to use the carriage, at least until your condition improves? You can ride the horses as much as you like after that, I implore you.”
……
I stopped myself from denying it again.
Wait a minute, does that mean I’ll never get to ride one?
My condition isn’t a lingering effect; it’s congenital, so it’s unlikely to improve beyond this point.
In that case, is there any need to deny it?
“…Understood.”
There’s no need to show weakness to the demons, and this will be better than making things awkward for everyone.
Perhaps it was the near-miss of having to ride a horse, but my throat felt dry.
Conveniently, I had the water bottle in my hand. I cautiously took a sip…
“Rookie, you’re getting pretty good at riding horses now, huh?”
“Not at all! I’m still lacking!”
“What’s with the modesty? That’s good enough. Now, all that’s left is the final procedure, right?”
“Yeah, there’s one important thing left. You could call it a unique tradition of our legion? Though it hasn’t been around that long.”
A unique tradition. Does the 0th Legion have something like that?
Hearing something for the first time, I couldn’t help but eavesdrop, even though I knew it was rude.
The final procedure, what could it be?
Before that, the very idea of the 0th Legion having a tradition is questionable.
The 0th Legion was created because of me. That means it’s a newly formed legion, barely two years old… a tradition?
Worried that the sound of me swallowing water would interfere with hearing their conversation, I kept the water in my mouth, focusing on their words.
And I would come to regret not swallowing it.
“There’s one story every member of the 0th Legion must know. It’s the story about our Legion Commander, Demon-nim.”
“Ah, could it be…”
“Yeah, since we’re the 0th Legion, we need to know the details of when Demon-nim killed the hero, so we don’t embarrass ourselves later.”
Ptooey-!!
“Cough, cough! Hack, wheeze.”
“Demon-nim?!”
Thankfully, I had lowered my head quickly, preventing the misfortune of spitting water all over Ed’s face. I hastily wiped my mouth, coughing to clear the water that had gone down the wrong way.
This, in turn, startled Ed.
Fussing over me, he pulled out a fresh handkerchief and held it to my mouth. He then slightly pulled the handkerchief away to check it, his expression filled with shock as he stammered,
“Bl-blood…”
Huh? Did I cough up blood again?
Judging by his pale complexion, it seems I did. Again.
Well, it’s not like this is the first or second time. No need to be so alarmed….
“No blood! Doctor, doctor!!”
……?
“Ben! Where are you! Beeeeen!!”
Excuse me? Doesn’t something seem off to you right now?
Why is he more shocked that there isn’t blood? Shouldn’t it be the other way around?
His handkerchief was clean.
At least, there weren’t any red stains on it.
Of course not. I just choked on my water.
“What’s the matter!”
Good heavens. Even Ben has arrived.
Seeing him rushing over like this, my conscience pricks me for no reason.
I tried to salvage the situation, but my overly loyal adjutant, the one I sometimes wished I could banish far away, grabbed Ben by the collar before I could, yelling frantically,
“Demon-nim suddenly had a bad coughing fit, but there was no blood!”
“Good heavens!”
At this point, I gave up on trying to understand.
That’s it. These guys are completely illogical.